“You’d better know that in the end. It’s better to say too much. Then never say what you need to say again”- John Mayer, “Say”
Fear can be a very powerful force when it comes to decision making. We all have fears when it comes down to deciding to do something. For example, there are many times I wished I had kept in touch with a classmate after getting to know them from class, but didn’t because of fear. I wished that I had asked for their contact, such as their number, but didn’t for fear of rejection or them judging me (weirded out). I just couldn’t say the words ‘what is your number’ or ‘let’s keep in touch’.
I was paralyzed by fear until it was just too late and the class had ended. By the time my mind was straight, I realized a good opportunity had been missed. Then, I try to find them on social media, sometimes with or without success. Mostly the latter. Or there were times when I wish I had talked to a person, even to make small talk, because of fear I didn’t. Fear of rejection or negative judgement.
Fear in decision making isn’t just limited to my example. For others, it may be the fear of failure that makes them not enter a competition or take a class that they really want to. Fear of failure can inhibit someone from applying for a dream job. Fear of heights can restrict someone from doing something that involves heights, such as skydiving or climbing a mountain.
To the outsider who has not experienced your fear, it might seem odd that your fear can have such an effect, but I can assure you that they are real and can greatly influence your decisions. Fears will often leave you asking the ‘what ifs’. And possibly regretful. Then you realize it’s too late and that opportunity had passed. What if I had taken that class or applied for that dream job? What if I had climbed a mountain?
I have started to overcome my fear by living by the phrase ‘you only live once’ (aka: #yolo). You might as well do it because sooner or later the opportunity would pass. Make every second count. So do whatever you want to do cause #yolo!